Hey
I go by the name of eMc
Clap three times if you can hear me
Clap three times if you can hear me
CLAP THREE TIMES IF YOU CAN HEAR ME
Do you want to hear a poem?
Well do ya?
How about I just cut myself open and bleed a little of my heart out to ya?
Because isn’t that what you really want to see?
A whole lot of truth and vulnerability?
Or do I make you uncomfortable with my honesty?
It’s okay, I’m sure you’ll turn me into whatever you want me to be.
Cuz most of you don’t even know me, not really
You see, I’ve got monsters locked inside this closet of a chest
They go by the names of pride, fear, insecurity, arrogance, apathy and selfishness
I just can’t seem to keep it quiet, that little voice reminding me of how much I suck
How much I should feel fine cuz I’m blessed
How ugly and awful and stupid I am
It’s no wonder I get depressed
And I keep hurting people
They hop in line from one to the next
And instead of dealing with my issues maybe sometimes I’d rather just forget
I mean I’m a fallen human being, that’s the point isn’t it?
That I’m not perfect so I’ll use that as a crutch
Use my words to say I’m sorry while I wind up for another punch to your chest
Like where my monsters are locked
My verbal gun’s all ready, cleaned and cocked
I preach SPEAK LIFE
But so many times I’d rather give people a piece of my mind
Because there are days where I really love people
And I want nothing more than to love them well despite being put through their selfish hell
But then those days come when I feel like I just can’t take anymore
The weight is too freaking heavy and I’m gonna cave, cuz who’s there to save the girl who’s always wearing the cape?
Yeah, some days I wish I could just fly away cuz all of it gets me wanting an escape
But I can’t escape myself
And who am I supposed to go to for help?
Cuz the scariest monster locked inside my heart goes by the name of hope
And when it’s terrifying to have that how the heck do you cope?
But I’m learning, step by step, slowly
Like I’m walking on a tight rope
Confession: I don’t know that I’ve ever had great balance
Some days I’m drowning in doubt, and shame and fear but hope is real
And I’m trying to trust that despite the deep seeded aches and pains that I feel
There is hurt in me that runs deeper than my veins
But there are things in this life that we just can’t change
However there are also things within our control
And I don’t wanna let fear have the reigns anymore
So I’m gonna white knuckle death grip hold on to the truth that there is a God who delights in me
Who fights for me
Saw that girl in the cape needing an escape and died for me
Sometimes I get tired of wearing my heart on my sleeve
So people can freely prick and poke at it as they come and go in and out of my life as they please
But how do I reconcile that with claiming to follow a guy who loved to the point of being crucified on a tree?
People say: don’t be a doormat!
But if it takes walking all over me to get people to a love they couldn’t previously see then so be it
I’ll don that dirty tattered cape and try to stay despite wanting to fly away
Maybe the pain will be worth it at the end of the day
This life is a fight and if your knuckles aren’t bloody then you’re not doing it right
We were never meant to live life safe
We were never meant to live life safe
I need to hear that just as much, if not more than you do
Cuz you see, I’m real good at stringing the words together
And not always the best at the follow through
I’m nowhere near perfect, I’m no better than you, neither is anyone else
We’re all some sort of ridiculous mess
So how about we all be friends?
Acknowledge our pain, worry less about being offended, and start trying harder to help each other mend it
All of us have hurt, I know it’s not just me
So if you can hear me, don’t clap three times
Come say hi, or give me a high five, or let me hear your story
It would be an honor, truly, if you were to share even a little of your life with me
If you take nothing else away from this poem
Please just know you’re not alone
We all have monsters locked inside and you don’t have to fight on your own
Vulnerability is a risk, people might perceive you how they want you to be
But vulnerability in the right context can also help us become free
Whoever you are, whatever you’ve done, I want that for you
You’re not too much, too awful, too messed up, too anything to love
You don’t have to clap, but I hope that you’re hearing me cuz it’s true
I’m begging you, fight the good fight, do not accept defeat
I’ll be fighting not to give up too, we can battle together ferociously
Now that I’ve opened up some of my wounds for ya’ll to see
It’s nice to meet you, I go by the name of Emily